Sunday, April 13, 2008

Smoke without Worry

Advances in Nanotechnology Lead to Healthy Cigarette

Nanotechnology has paved the way for a healthy cigarette -- one whose filter can absorb every impurity and release small doses of oxygen to the smoker, which doctors say will keep the smoker alive on average 5-10 years longer than a non-smoker.
This technology reportedly cost Big Tobacco $1-$2-billion dollars to develop and was years in the making. It is code-named "Last Laugh." It is expected to reap big rewards for Big Tobacco, which saw its fortunes decline dramatically when it was sued by several states in the '90s for malfeasance.
Essentially, the space-age filter is made of micro fibers, which can convert--or invert--toxins into pure oxygen. This has even health nuts taking notice.
"It will allow former smokers to return to their first love, smoking. It will allow lifelong non-smokers to finally puff up. It will allow us to market to grade-schoolers now," said Chief Technological Officer, Bill Wade.
"Really, the only thing about smoking that will stay the same is the smell," Wade said. "We found smokers are very nostalgic about the smell, so we didn't mess with it."
Wade said the smell of cigarettes will now be associated with "health" and "longevity," instead of the more negative associations of the past.


Uva Oxide said...

Oh? I thought you were going to be telling us about smoking in Second Life. How smoking in virtual is like a leap of consciousness with a suspended disbelief placebo, a suggestion of smoking that transfers a false constricting of the capillaries making the nicotine addicted person feel slightly like they are OK with not really smoking.
(Um.. though I don't really count because only the tree me smokes, one would have to test this on a real smoker perhaps.)

Pounamu Kohime said...

I haven't seen one of your hilarious and interesting blogs on (formerly for ages Patric, where you been and are you coming back? We miss ya dude.

Patrick said...

Lol, Uva :)

Soon, Pounamu, soon...

And thank you very much for that.

Anonymous said...

There is now a new quit smoking drug available in the market. This latest breakthrough is known as Chantix. It is able to help smokers snub out their addiction by working on the brain.

Anonymous said...

any chance we can get some more info on this?