Real Resume

The owner of a local company sent this along. This is an actual resume he received the other day.
(Highlights are his.)

SL/Great Ideas with Clubs

Wrath Paine had the idea of having alts with the last name "Morrisey" (in honor of the singer) show up at various clubs in Second Life in Flash Mob Style. Basically, a call would go out about an event (via IM), and all these Morriseys would suddenly show up.

It was all the more intriguing since Morrisey is an "alternative" singer and these are alts.

Meanwhile...

Conifer had the idea of starting a group in Second Life to explore forgotten or deserted dance clubs. As she points out, they're everywhere in Second Life, so we might as well take advantage of them. She's organizing revelers to visit these (sometimes elaborate) structures to party in. She's not interested in tacky, poorly designed clubs--she's interested in "beautiful, or at least imaginative clubs, from glittery rave halls to steamy industrial stomping pits."

As a bonus, she says these events will be lag free.

SL/Headless/Still looking for a head

He was in a nite club scoping out a future head.
There was only one way to do his homework...
By taking lots of photos.

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SL/Love

Reventon Piaggio shouts: I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY
BigCash Hotshot shouts: Reventon STOP THAT PLEASE
Devilish Gears shouts: okay, we get it!!! geez
Adora Galthie: ffs
Hadda Doobie: true love is when it shoves other peoples' sentences off screen

SL/Mature PG

Hadda Doobie: no nudity here
Hadda Doobie: no naked pixels here
Adora Galthie: lol
Hadda Doobie: I got around the PG limitation by secretly wearing pubic hair on my face, and no one was the wiser
Adora Galthie: Tsk
Hadda Doobie: sorry, stoned

SL/Meet Hadda Doobie

...He's headless

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Kanako Yokosuka: how can i change my appearance?
Hadda Doobie: you aren't allowed to change your appearance for at least one week after arriving inworld
Hadda Doobie: i know, i was born with a beard
Droog Voom: lololol
[Someone pointed out Hadda's lack of a head.]
Hadda Doobie: i had a head when i first came inworld
Hadda Doobie: but we had such a severe lag storm recently I'm grateful this much survived
Atom Cryotank: have you explored much?
Hadda Doobie: i started to explore when the lag hit and they took me to a hospital
Dooble Voom: not a UFO? you had no missing time??
Hadda Doobie: missing limb
Droog Voom: ahhhh much better
Hadda Doobie: i don't miss my head
Droog Voom: dats the trick
Hadda Doobie: i still have a penis
Droog Voom: ahhhh

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 39/no advertising

A gentleman was wearing a title above his head which indicated he wanted to be messaged about a new club he was managing, called "The Shop." "They are recruiting early," Soy noted.

To get his attention, Soy said "I was going to IM a woman about a new nude disco she was opening today." That got everyone's attention, including the manager's. Soy continued, "No one is allowed in her club unless completely nude." Nobody batted an eyelash at this information. Soy concluded, "It's the only form of discrimination that's still allowed."

Finally, one woman said something; she said she was dialing her lawyer.

"What for?" inquired Soy.

"Habit," she insisted.

"Call me instead."

"What's your Second Life number?"

"F2 F3 F4 - F9 F1 F9 F8"

SL/the ol' seated on the sofa prank

The discussion was about twittering and blogging.
Someone asked for the defintion of "twitter," and I said "neverending nervous typing."
/
There was limited seating. The host apologized for the lack of seating, and I apologized for taking up so much room on the couch.
I got up from the lying position and used a fake "sit" animation from my inventory. It looked like I was "sitting," but I really wasn't. I positioned myself on the end of the couch. /
Now where's my first victim?
Here she is.

SL/Party Bus

Yetrates got a party bus. It had all kinds of funky graffiti on it. Plus, when the sun went down, the headlights came on automatically. It was a trip.

Speaking of tripping, we drove around the entire sim--the roads were nice and wide. At one point we decided to pick up random people. Why not? It was a party bus, after all. Since it was dark out, and we couldn't see anything, we had to use the mini-map. Green dots on the map represented people.
We stopped next to what we thought was a green dot.
"I don't see anything," said Yet after a bit.
"Neither do I," I said. "Drive on."
So she drove on.
"Wait," I said, after a bump. "That was a furry."
"Ok. I'll go back."
"Too late," I said. "Keep driving."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 38/PG

Soy Burger: you will only see male nipples here

Soy Burger: you will have to wait for a "mature" sim to see female nipples

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Chips Cupola: Do you like big feet?

Maud Wingtips: just fine =)

Malaria Donat: why not

Soy Burger: i made my feet especially big in Welcome Area since i knew it was a PG sim

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Johnny Spicola: i am on a mission

Johnny Spicola: to find a penis

Malaria Donat: ;)

Soy Burger: on "day 3" of every male newbie, a search for a penis is underway

Maud Wingtips: lolololol

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 37/blackmail

He was "Editing his Appearance" and accidentally adjusted it so he had zero muscles, when she took a pic.

SL/New Neighbors

A mysterious body of water caught my attention as I was flying near home. Investigating further, it looks like a new development.
I have no words to describe.

SL/Event

SL/Overheard

Destiny

"One day Second Life will get its servers straightened out and there will be no more lag and birds will be everywhere, random birds, flying here and there. As well as insects. Having no more lag will invite more possibilities, such as insects and birds. And it will get tweaked even more so that birds can leave messes and insects can smash into windshields. Yes, windshields. Windshields will be a lot more common once more and more cars are on the roads. Roads will perhaps give way to freeways. Freeways that support unlimited cars..."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 36/Tales around the Campfire

Michael interrupted the campfire in his quest for sex

Michael1 Aeon: maybe i can buy a vagina in this game?
Plex Olivier: maybe you should buy a penis first
Michael1 Aeon: i have a very large penis
Scamper Nitely [a dog]: I'll sell you one
Plex Olivier: oooooh
Soy Burger: go ahead and sell him a canine penis
Soy Burger: they are not very big but noticeable
Anita Alcott: gross
Someone was taking snapshots...
Plex Olivier: who is photoing?
Soy Burger: a ghost
Scamper Nitely: not me
Soy Burger: we got photo ghosts
Soy Burger: around campfire

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 35/Sightings

Soy: a winged creature came to my campfire
Soy: i love it when winged creatures come to my campfire
Soy: By the way, there was a UFO here last night, and when I went to take snapshots of it I discovered my harddrive was full.
Sianne: lol
Sianne: Was it a green alien?
Sianne: or one of them grey ones?
Soy: couldn't see thru the tiny windows
Sianne: it didn't land?
Sianne: you shoulda shot it down!
Sianne: you coulda made the news!
Soy: yeah i was too afraid
Soy: didn't want it to be Santa
Soy: i remember reading a few stories about that last year
Soy: Santa getting shot down here and there
Sianne: really who would shot Santa down?
Soy: it may have been a former reindeer
Sianne: a reindeer?
Soy: Santa is known to use a whip
Soy: there are lots of santa decoys, tho
Soy: i don't think he was hit
Sianne: That is good I don't wanna miss out on pressies next year
Soy: yeah, all you need is santa and china to stay alive
Sianne: lol
pixiedust: Hi Sianne
Sianne: How are you?
pixiedust: just looking around, what trouble are you up too
pixiedust: be careful people in here are troublemakers
pixiedust: soy is friends with all of them
Sianne: Nothing much just chatting to soy here about the ufo he saw!
pixiedust: Don't believe him
pixiedust: it is a side effect of the marijuanna
Sianne: He didn't shoot it cause he thought it might be santa
Soy: i think the UFO was here because he needs to get from one place to another and hasn't discovered teleporting yet

SL/Evolution?

Milo had a new friend over to the pool. Except his friend only spoke Serbian, or so I thought.
That is, until I told him that he left his tail behind in pool.
"Fuck the tail" he said.
I was suprised; he did speak some English.
"I don't need it."
"You are going to be a furry without a tail?" Furries with no tails, or tails cut short, are frowned upon by other furries. Did he know that?
"Who cares?"
"?"

"mentol tail"
"menthol tail?"
"mentol tail"
"Ahhh, you mean mental tail. In other words, your mind still thinks you have a tail?"

Fascinating

The 100 oldest registered domain names. Click here to see the rest.

SL/Something happened (damned if I know what)

Here I am full throttle with my new outfit, an ape.
I hung out at the nite clubs, and danced, as usual, but something was bothering me--something I couldn't put my finger on. Then I recalled what happened! It happened at my other property this morning, the property next to the swamp...the property I seldom visit. A long time ago for some reason I built a black monolith there and abandoned it. I honestly forgot all about it. Then this morning I went there inexplicably. I'm not sure what happened after that, but I do remember seeing the monolith. Since then I've had a nagging feeling that I shouldn't be hanging out at the clubs anymore. I will let you know what happens.

SL/Meet Lunar Blinker

He enjoyed hanging out temporarily clothed at the nude beach.
"I don't have a buff body but I understand I can get naked here?"
A stud named Trey didn't think so.
"Jesus man! You wide! Get lost."
Then a babe chimed in:
"The SL gods gave you free will, Lunar, so do as you please, but do it out of my eyesight."
"You mean I should walk off your screen right now?"
"Yes, if you are naked."
"What if I have the most fascinating tattoo in the world on my butt...would u look?"
"No."
"What if this tattoo had something to do with your heritage?"
"I still wouldn't look."
Lunar was not getting anywhere. "I cannot stand being around all these buff bodies," he announced. "I'm going to bury myself in sand." Then he thought of a better plan. "I'm going to rejoin the ocean." He waddled out to the sea.
"Damn that is a big butt," he heard someone crack.
He waded into the water. "No sharks here," he muttered. "No lightning either. Yet there is a definite threat of me re-emerging naked on beach."

His tormentor Trey showed up in water.
Lunar got defensive.
"Watch out! I can make bigger waves than u"
"LoL. Come back to the mainland, Lunar."
"Why?" Lunar was confused.
"We miss picking on you."
"Oh, all right." Lunar followed him back to the mainland.
"Lunar said he could make bigger waves than me," Trey laughed, informing his buff posse of the exchange. "I said I didn't want to risk a tsunami."
"Ahahahahahaahahahaha."
Lunar blushed. He noticed his blush extended down his upper cheeks to his stubby neck then disappeared under his undershirt. Maybe to his cheeks below...
"What are you daydreaming about?" someone asked Lunar.
"Nothing...I learned to fly today."
"You mean you learned how to blot out the sun?"
Ahahahahhahaahahahaha. Meanwhile, Lunar saw that Trey had two nice-looking women mother-henning him.
Nardya Rousselot: I think we start with the shape

Alyssa Salmson: then skin

Nardya Rousselot: hair, eyes, new clothes, and on

Trey Honi: what shape do i want?

Nardya Rousselot: don't worry, Trey, we will show you what you need

Trey Honi: kk, lets go :)

Lunar couldn't relate.

"Women don't bother taking me shopping anymore," he said. "They figure my body is beyond hope."

Nardya Rousselot: lol

Lunar Blinker: i told them I looked good at Orientation Island, tho