Fire ants

For the past several days I've been suffering the effects of getting bit multiple times by those little bastards known as fire ants.

I got bit on Sunday (while putting up signs), and now it's Tuesday, so that's three days worth of suffering. Three days of hell.

You should see my hand.

I have a stronger than usual reaction to fire ant bites--to the point where you can literally see the pustules growing. I used to carry a bottle of vinegar in my truck in the event I got bit, because I'd read somewhere that rubbing vinegar on the bites can neutralize the stings. (It works if you do it immediately.) I actually did it once, and to my amazement, it worked. Somewhere along the way, though, I got rid of the vinegar, and I suffered for it Sunday.

And Monday. And Tuesday.

Right after I got bit, I ran across the street to a convenience store, frantically searching for a bottle of vinegar, knowing I had only about a minute, at the most, to neutralize the stings.

No vinegar at the store, dammit. So I bought a bottle of Tabasco sauce. And walked outside. And poured it over my hand. (Tabasco has vinegar in it.)

But it was too late; the pustules were already growing.

My friend Bill suggested I put salt over the bites to draw out the poison. (Why not?) So I walked back inside the store, got some salt, walked back outside and poured it all over my hand. Anyone wandering by at that moment would have thought I was crazy: my hand was now dripping with Tabasco sauce, and covered in salt.

Monday at work I was totally nauseous. I couldn't eat. I had chills. The toxins were taking their toll.

I went to the health food store after work and got a bottle of the most potent stuff they had for colds and flu. It tasted like poison, but I was told it would work for ant bites. I went right to bed after sipping that horrible stuff. I was exhausted.

Tuesday I woke up feeling 50% better. By Tuesday afternoon I was 80% better. As I write this I am 90% better. With every key stroke, though, I am reminded how much my hand itches, and how much I dislike fire ants.